elvis was a cannibal
he ate big mama thorton
and left his dog to howl
while he sang like shit
in acapulco.
he wore nice pants.
became a lifeguard/singer,
dove off a cliff, and got the girl.
bossa nova baby hit
number 1 on the charts
a week after JFK was shot.
oswald was in mexico
while fun in acapulco
was on location.
but elvis wasn't.
he was banned
by the mexican government.
coincidence? or was jack ruby
with him in l.a. at paramount studios
working on the script for dallas.
zapruder was
recruited by kodak
and supplied with a
special roll of film
pre-exposed with
special effects supplied
by animation genius
ray harryhausen.
oswald received his briefing
at the pyramid of the sun
from leon trotsky's grandson
who had been filmed by hidden camera
in a tryst with presley's costar,
ursula andress, in the toilet stall
of a tijuana strip joint. elvis
had a copy of the footage
shipped to his screening room
at graceland to join his collection
of blackmail materials.
perfect leverage to coerce andress
to seduce fidel castro on
a yacht belonging to sam giancana
anchored in acapulco.
she was able to persuade
fidel to smuggle che guevara
onto big mama thorton's houseboat
in sausalito, california.
che told thornton that if she couldn't
persuade johny otis to drop
his lawsuit over rights to hound dog
elvis was prepared to give
her other unreleased songs
to one of his secret lovers
janis joplin, who was living
across the bay in north beach.
all the deals were made
but came to naught
two months later
when the lads from liverpool
hit the lights on sullivan
and presley waddled across
the big vegas showrooms
and vied with liberace
for owning the ugliest cadillac
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