hangover cures

I should have run into Safeway

when I had the chance

to grab a fifth of Kentucky's

finest 90 proof.

Because when I got home

from the voting booth

I discovered a mere

three ounces in the bottle

and I sure would have liked

a few ounces more.

It would be worth the headache

and the nausea in the morning

would probably pass by noon,

instead of who knows when.

hey red states, red counties,

red-eyed true believers,

how about you pay your own damn bills

and mow your own damn lawns

and flip your own damn burgers

and mop your own damn floors.

and be sure to hustle

down to the payday loan store

on your way to score

some meth or oxy,

but please save enough

to feed your new grandchildren

when your daughter

moves back into her old bedroom

because her boyfriend isn't willing

to take a job gutting chickens

down at the processing plant

for minimum wage so he

sure as shit ain't gonna be making

any child support payments.

-he's holding out for those

auto assembly lines

to come back to doritoville.

good luck with your cancer

and your asthma

when all those coal mines

start roaring back up in the holler

and piss in your black rivers.

maybe you can get by

with some cheap florida

health care insurance.

I wish I'd had some bourbon

to pour over the rocks

but perhaps it's just as well

I didn't because this hangover

looks like it's going to last

for quite a spell.